Land of the Children
by karistarz
Summary: The Sanzoikkou fall off a cliff due to typical Hakkai driving and arrive at a town not marked on the map. However, there is something very strange about this town...no pairings, just your simple or not adventure story. ON INDEFINITE HIATUS.
1. Arrival at the Town

Land of the Children  
  
Kari: Hi!! My second fic!! Dunno what I'll do after this, I'm outta ideas.........hm. Hope that I can carry on this story for as long as possible. Anyway, this fic won't be as funny as my last one (but hopefully the plot will be as interesting ^_^). Funny thing that my ideas usually come when I'm in bed (more relaxed? Hm). Things in square brackets [] are interruptions by me.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Saiyuki, just 'borrowing' the characters!! =]  
  
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ON THE ROAD  
  
"Harahet - " Goku's moan was cut short by the harisen coming into contact with the boy's head.  
  
"URUSEI BAKASARU!" Sanzo yelled for the umpteenth time since they started travelling towards the next town. Gojyo laughed at Goku who was rubbing the huge bump on his head.  
  
"Hey, that bump kinda looks like a nikuman! Want me to cut that bump off for you so that you can eat it?" Gojyo summoned his shakujo, ready to carry out his idea.  
  
"NANI?! I don't want to eat my own HEAD ero kappa!" Goku cried, trying to keep Gojyo's weapon from coming too close to the bump on his head.  
  
"Don't worry, I'm sure that you won't need that part of your head. Anyway it won't do any damage, since I doubt that you will even have a brain inside that head of yours baka!" Gojyo lunged forward again, trying to break through Goku's defences.  
  
-_-# *BANG!*  
  
A shot rang out, narrowly missing Gojyo and Goku who froze in awkward positions when Sanzo pulled the trigger.  
  
"If you two won't shut up, I'll be happy to assist you, and believe me, it will be permanent," the blonde monk said calmly but dangerously.  
  
^_^; "Maa, maa......please calm down, we're only a few miles away from the next town I think..." Hakkai smiled his usual smile, trying to steer and read the map at the same time. Sanzo grunted and resumed his normal 'disturb me, you die' position in his seat. The two passengers at the back ceased bickering (for the moment). Goku sighed, and decided to take his mind off his empty stomach by looking at the beautiful scenery. They were on a narrow road protruding out from a steep mountainside that overlooked a vast forest. Sanzo shut his eyes to get some rest, but unfortunately...  
  
"OI ERO GOKIBURI!! Why did you poke me?"  
  
"Me?? Poke a bakasaru like you?! Pur-leeeaase! If I did, your baka germs might crawl onto my beautiful body and infect me with your stupid-ness!" [actually Goku was poked by a branch sticking out from the side of the cliff]  
  
"NANI?! I'm NOT baka! Besides, you're an ero kappa!"  
  
"Who are you calling ero, BAKASARU?"  
  
"Ero ero ero EROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Goku chanted defiantly. Gojyo turned to the green-eyed driver and said,  
  
"Oi Hakkai! Please drive off this cliff; I don't want to hear a certain SARU'S baka voice anymore!"  
  
"Hai!" Hakkai chirped obediently and swerved the jeep off the cliff.  
  
"WHAAAAAT?! Oi Hakkai I was only jokinggggggggg...!" Gojyo screamed, his voice echoing in the gorge.  
  
"WHEEEEEEEEEE this is FUN!!" Goku cried as the jeep fell down, down the tall cliff. Surprisingly, Sanzo remained in his 'disturb me, you die' position (though not as composed as before), ready to whip out his harisen the second they landed on the ground.  
  
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"Itaiiiii!" Goku and Gojyo said at the same time, one rubbing his head and the other rubbing his back. Amazingly (or maybe not, this IS the Sanzo- ikkou we're talking about ^_^), no one broke any bones. Hakuryu had turned back into his dragon form a few moments before they crashed into the ground. Goku had landed on his head, Gojyo landed on his back, Sanzo landed *gracefully* on his feet [WOAH Sanzo's so cool!] and Hakkai had grabbed a thick branch on a tree before he reached the ground which prevented him from suffering the same fate as Goku and Gojyo. Gojyo glared at Sanzo enviously.  
  
"Hey Sanzo, how on earth do you do that? Are you a cat in disguise or something [note: cats have the ability to land on their feet when dropped from a high height. Just in case you didn't know ^^]? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA a cat in a corrupt monk's clothing!" The Mighty Harisen stopped Gojyo from continuing his laughter. Sanzo grabbed Goku as well and proceeded to give both demons (erm well one half-demon and one demon) a thorough whacking on the head.  
  
*whack-whack-whack-whack-whack-whack-whack-whack-whack-whack-whack-whack- whack-whack-whack-whack-whack-whack-whack-whack-whack-whack-whack-whack- whack-whack-whack-whack-whack-whack!*  
  
"Yare yare desune..." Hakkai sighed, looking at his beaten-up companions holding their heads with 30 bumps on them [count the whacks ~_^]. Sanzo then shoved Goku away and proceeded to give Gojyo an extra 10 whacks with his harisen.  
  
*whack-whack-whack-whack-[ok you get the point]*  
  
When Sanzo was satisfied he stopped.  
  
"OI! What was that for Sanzo-sama?!" Gojyo yelled, finding it difficult to keep his head balanced on his neck with all the bumps on his head. Sanzo grunted and said,  
  
"'Ch. The first 30 whacks were for disturbing my peace in the jeep. The next 10 were for calling me a cat."  
  
"Maa, maa...shouldn't we concentrate on finding our way out of here first Sanzo?" Hakkai said, trying to calm everyone down. Goku moaned and tugged Sanzo's sleeve, saying,  
  
"Sanzo, harahetta...let's go eat!"  
  
"If you're so hungry go look for a few insects to eat. Sarus love eating insects and there are plenty here in the forest." Goku pouted and decided not to say anything (for a while). So they walked aimlessly through the forest (since the forest was too thick for a jeep to go through) with Hakkai holding the map, even though it wasn't very useful now.  
  
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"HEY GOKU!! Come over here!" Goyjo yelled, beckoning to the brown-haired boy. Goku's golden eyes lit up.  
  
"What? What is it?" Goku yelled back excitedly. He rushed over to Gojyo's side, eager to see what Gojyo discovered. Gojyo was staring intently at the roots of a tree.  
  
"Hey, show me!" the ever-impatient Goku said. Gojyo grinned evilly and grabbed a handful of bugs scuttling on the roots of the tree.  
  
"LUNCHTIME!" Gojyo yelled, shoving the squirming insects towards Goku's mouth. Goku yelped and ran away, trying to dodge Gojyo.  
  
"Yare yare desune..." Hakkai said his famous phrase as he watched Goku and Gojyo chase each other around the trees like children. A vein popped on Sanzo's head.  
  
-_-# "SHI-NE!" Sanzo shouted, shooting at Gojyo and Goku.  
  
"HELP MEEEEEEEEEE!!" Goku cried, jumping agilely out of Gojyo's way. Suddenly, something caught Gojyo's eyes that made him stop chasing Goku and peer through the trees. He was about to say something when he felt the shoureiju pressed against the back of his head and heard a voice saying,  
  
"Good. Now that you've stopped being so ridiculous, maybe you'd like to go somewhere, let's say, into the afterlife?" Sanzo said coldly, threatening the red-haired man.  
  
"Erm, no thanks...anyway I think I see a town over there..." Gojyo pointed to where he was staring. The monk 'humphed' and lowered his gun for a moment, looking at the direction Gojyo was pointing in. He caught a glimpse of something like a group of buildings.  
  
"Oi, Hakkai, bakasaru! We're going this way!" Sanzo yelled. Goku crept cautiously out of the trees, eyeing Gojyo before joining the others. Hakkai went over as well, with Hakuryu flying close behind him. After walking for a bit, the forest slowly thinned out, and as they emerged from the forest they saw a town settled comfortably in a cirque [a cirque is a bowl-shaped valley but with one side open, so basically there's a mountain encircling the town].  
  
"YAY a town!! Finally, I can EAT!" Goku cried happily and sped off towards the town, leaving dust swirling behind him. Gojyo grinned and said,  
  
"Hey, wait for me bakasaru! You'll scare off all the pretty ladies with your stupidity!" Gojyo ran off as well, leaving Hakkai and Sanzo behind.  
  
"Oh well. At least they're happy." Hakkai smiled at Sanzo who had his arms folded across his chest, eyeing the two retreating figures of Goku and Gojyo.  
  
"'Ch."  
  
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Kari: *phew* First chapter done!! Feel free to review! Oh and please don't be put off, there is something very unusual about this town. Very unusual indeed............*cackles insanely whilst walking away*  
  
Hakkai: ^_^;; Wow, she's a weird one.  
  
Sanzo: 'Ch. If she writes ANYTHING bad about me, I'm gonna kill her...  
  
Goku: (runs towards Sanzo crying) WAAAAAAAAAAA SANZO that ero kappa forced me to eat those insects *ptui ptui* I think I have food poisoning now...  
  
Gojyo: Bakasaru! *laughs evilly* Blame Sanzo, it was his idea. Anyway, I'm off to chase Kari!  
  
All: O_O;;  
  
Kari: (in the distance) *WHACK* Get your hands off me you ero kappa!  
  
Sanzo: Hey...where's my fan?!  
  
Kari: *smiles evilly* 


	2. First Impressions

Kari: Wheeee a 19-month writer's block! XD Who gets those nowadays? I guess I've been waaaay too busy, and I didn't really know how to carry on the plot yet (I didn't have a plan! Uh oh…)

Sanzo: Busy? HA! Now there's a laugh. I suppose watching TV all day counts as being 'busy'!

Kari: SHHHH! Hey…how do YOU know about TVs? They haven't even been invented yet!

Hakkai: Well, neither have jeeps or any sort of automated vehicle…

Kari: …good point…ANYWAY, here's the very long awaited chapter TWO! -strikes the victory pose-

Sanzo-ikkou: O.o"

Kari: Ummm….yea….so here's the disclaimer….I don't own Gensomaden Saiyuki.

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"Women…sake…cigarettes…" (no prizes for guessing who said that)) Gojyo chanted his famous mantra as they approached the town.

"Fooooooooooooood…." (again, no prizes) Goku's stomach growled, and his face had the 'I'm-soooo-hungry-FEED-ME!' expression. Hakkai and Sanzo lagged a bit behind as usual, with Hakkai still examining the map.

"Funny; this town doesn't seem to be on the map anywhere…I guess it's quite a remote area then…" Hakkai murmured half to himself. Sanzo just grunted, and took out his packet of Marlboro and his lighter whilst he took in his new surroundings. Though many of the houses looked quite roomy and strong, the overgrown vines and plants surrounding them spoke of not being well-kept for a while. Dust, dirt and leaves swirled on the ground, and the place would have screamed of danger and desertedness if there weren't children sitting around. And staring as the quartet entered. Sanzo wasn't sure if the others felt it, but he could feel every single pair of eyes glued onto them as they walked down the street. What made it even more eerie was how the children just stared, almost expressionless, and deafeningly silent (once you tune out Gojyo and Goku's voices – this, apparently, wasn't difficult at all for Sanzo as they were quite ahead). Sanzo was about to growl out a "What the hell are YOU staring at!" to all of them when a young kid who looked around three or four ran up to him, threw his thin arms around Sanzo's knees, and yelled,

"DADDY!" Due to the previous silence being broken, everyone heard it. Even Gojyo and Goku who were quite a ways ahead stopped to turn and look. Sanzo's cigarette fell to the ground, and Gojyo promptly burst out in hysterics.

"HAHAHAHAHA! Whoohooo monk, I never knew you had it in ya!" Gojyo practically gasped this out as he was too busy laughing his head off.

"Ne, Sanzo, did you adopt a child in the past?" Poor Goku was confused as ever.

"Sanzo, I can understand Gojyo having a kid but not you!" Even Hakkai was chortling quite loudly (but not as loudly as Gojyo as his usual politeness didn't allow it) which was saying something. Gojyo was laughing too hard to retort at this slightly implied insult, and Goku was still going "Whaaaat? I don't get it!" Sanzo, after finally having gotten over the shock, quickly developed a twitch above his left temple.

"Urusei!" But Gojyo, and Hakkai were laughing too hard to notice, and Goku was busy trying to deal with all the swarming question marks around his head.

"My, my, Sanzo, I must congratulate you for finding the woman of your life! Wait, I think the kid got it wrong – he shoulda called you 'Mummy'! Besides, I never knew that monks were allowed to procreate!" Sanzo's left eye started to twitch with anger.

"Yea Sanzo! Uhhh what's procre-what-chya-ma-call-it?" That was the last straw. He whipped out the shoureiju.

-BANGBANGBANG!- That proved extremely effective as Gojyo froze in mid-laugh, and Hakkai covered his mouth with his hand. A question mark remained above Goku's head but quickly scuttled away in fright.

"URUSEI!" If the previous silence was deafening, this one was so quiet you could hear dust floating onto the ground. Sanzo looked down at the child who caused the commotion. By now, the child, oblivious to the previous outburst, was actually _snuggling _into Sanzo's arms, causing Sanzo's fingers to twitch wildly around his gun with the gigantic urge to kill. His bangs shadowed his eyes, screaming danger to his comrades. But before anyone could do anything else, a gasp rang in the air.

"Jou! Stop that now!" An older boy came running barefoot through the crowd of children, kicking up dust as he did. He pried the younger boy off Sanzo whilst bowing to him at the same time.

"Gomennasai! Gomennasai! My younger brother is only six this year, and he doesn't really know anything! Gomennasai!" He glared at his brother who was looking down at the ground with a red face, embarrassed at the mistake.

"But, daddy also has yellow hair!" the child wailed as his last defence as he was dragged away by his older brother. Everyone left was staring at the retreating duo, either shocked (Hakkai, Goku, Gojyo), really confused/pissed off/in disbelief/wants to kill something (Sanzo) or dispassionate (children). Hakkai was the first to break their reverie by clearing his throat, causing all eyes to be fixed on him (no pressure Hakkai…)

"Ummm…..could anyone here please lead us to the nearest inn?" he sheepishly put on his typical Hakkai smile. And received more stares. Finally, a relatively small and grubby looking girl (or is it a boy? Hakkai wondered) spoke up.

"What's a inn?" Hakkai sweatdropped, Sanzo grunted in annoyance, and Gojyo chuckled a bit.

"Aww, ya know, where you can find sake, cigarettes, and best of all, wo-" Hakkai clamped a hand over Gojyo's mouth before he could 'pollute' the child's mind.

"Don't forget food ero kappa!" Goku flashed a huge smile, knowing that the said 'kappa' couldn't talk back with Hakkai's hand over his mouth.

"Yare yare desune…well it's a place where we can find a place to stay and-"

"Ohhh! Why didn't ya say so?" A grin broke out on the child's face as she grabbed Hakkai's other hand and started dragging him in one direction. "Come, come with me! Rina will take you to nee-chan's place!" Hakkai looked at Goku who shrugged, and looked at Sanzo. Sanzo just 'ch-ed' and followed Hakkai, mumbling, "Wasted a good cig…". Gojyo and Goku fell in step, with Goku waving and smiling goodbye to the other children.

"Bye-bye! And thanks for helping us!" The children just stared, still huddled around each other for protection, causing their eyes to stand out like sorrowful stars in the sky…

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Kari: YAY I'm done! You may have noticed that my writing style has changed (not as many faces or interruptions from me)…ah well. Change is good!

Goku: Yea! So you can take it to the food stall and buy pork buns, or noodles, or fried rice, or…

Sanzo: -whacks Goku with harisen- Bakasaru! Not THAT kind of change!

Kari: -glares at Sanzo- Hey! Don't be mean to Goku!

Sanzo: Make me…

-glaring competition ensues-

Hakkai: Maa, maa…you two are sooo scary…-stares at the lightning bolts flashing between Kari and Sanzo-

Kari: So stay tuned for chapter three! Who is this 'nee-chan'? DUM-DUM-DUMMM! And pray that I won't have another 19-month writer's block. -returns to glaring match- O.O


	3. Confrontation

Kari: I'm on a roll here… Thanks for all the reviews people!! And if you're wondering why the town is weird, then it's all explained here, in chapter three…unless I decide to be mean and move it to chapter four….MUAHAHAHAHA!

Goku: Ummm shouldn't you be doing homework? –points to the 5-storey high pile of homework-

Kari: I can't seeeeeeeeee it lalalalala! –covers eyes-

Sanzo: Baka. If you cover your eyes, you can't write the story!

Kari: ………..shut up. -.- Anyway, back to the story! Before I continue – me no own Saiyuki (duh…)

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"Ya know, Hakkai, Rina could be leading us into a trap where we'd have to fight off a huge, crazy demon who wants to savour the monk's flesh and take the sutras and yadda yadda…not that I'd mind Sanzo being eaten or anything, but my poor hair's gonna be ruined again! You _know_ that I'm running out of hair gel!" Gojyo points to his antennae.

"Yea, and then I can't call him a gokiburi anymore…OUCH stop that!" Goku yelled as his face got acquainted with Gojyo's foot. Sanzo calmly took out his harisen and whacked both on the head, all within one second.

-WHACK! WHACK!-

"Itaaaaii…" Goku and Gojyo moaned simultaneously, grabbing their heads to stop the throbbing. Meanwhile, Rina was still pulling on Hakkai's arm (luckily for her, she grabbed the right person. Heaven knows what would happen if she had grabbed Sanzo instead…), intently focused on her task on bringing them to 'nee-chan'. Hakkai, on the other hand, was beginning to notice something oddly out of place…although the children were a bit too quiet and stared waaaay too much to be normal, they still looked normal, and he couldn't sense any demons' aura around them. What bugged him more was the fact that they had nothing better to do than to stand around. Not one of them were playing, or fighting, or at _least_ doing what children do best – smile. It seemed as if they were beyond listless, lifeless even, which was most disturbing. In addition to this, their parents seemed to be strangely absent in all this. At first, he had thought that they were working in the fields or at their family stores, but after he had passed several empty paddy fields (which were obviously unattended to as the water had dried up, and the plants had withered already), he began to guess again.

"Ah, Gojyo, do you notice anything weird about this place?" Gojyo stopped arguing with Goku (as usual, he and Goku only stopped for a while after Sanzo hit them, and started again when Gojyo dropped a bug down Goku's shirt) to turn and look at the healer.

"Weird? Man, Hakkai, you are waaaaaay too observant and paranoid. I mean, what's weird about a town that is full of children with bug-like eyes who think Sanzo's their daddy and go around hugging strangers? Wait…that didn't come out right…" Hakkai sweatdropped and was about to reply when the pulling on his arm stopped, and Rina let go.

"Here! Here is nee-chan's place! Now Rina has to go…bye-bye tall strangers!" She hugs Hakkai (awwwwww…) once, and scampers off into the distance. Gojyo snickers.

"Yo, Hakkai! Was that your daughter?" Hakkai cast Gojyo a withering look, and for a split second, remembered the love he lost. Gojyo must have sensed the change in mood as he stopped smiling and mumbled,

"Ahh…umm sorry…never mind what I said…" Hakkai forced himself to put on his cheerful face again and shook off the apology with a "What are you talking about?" Sanzo humphed and saved Gojyo from more embarrassment by saying,

"Are we going to go or what? Unless you guys want to skip this town altogether and move on…"

"NOOOOOO Sanzo!! YOU CAN'T DO THAT! Not when I'm staaaaaaarrrrvviiinggg!" Goku cried, tears forming in his eyes as he thought of his empty stomach. Sanzo glared frostily at the boy.

"Oh really? And I suppose those insects we were talking about earlier wouldn't satisfy you?"

"Maa, maa, Sanzo…Goku's just hungry, and there's food and shelter up ahead! Let's just forget all this and go now okay?" Hakkai tried to placate the fuming monk (he would never admit it, but he was kind of hungry himself) as Gojyo laughed discreetly in the background.

"'Ch. Then what are you waiting for?" Goku sighed in relief as Sanzo turned to walk towards the house in front of them. Gojyo eyed the so-called 'inn' skeptically as they approached it. It wasn't much different from the other houses with vines running all over it, and some weeds growing on the dusty ground. The only indication that someone was inside was some shuffling and clinking noises. As Gojyo lifted his hand to shield his eyes from the late afternoon sun, he asked,

"Hey, are you _sure_ this is an inn? It doesn't even have a freaking sign!"

"Even if it did it would be a wasted cause on you…since when does a baka like you know how to read?" Never short on insults, Sanzo knew exactly how to pull Gojyo's strings. Or rather, yank them. Hard.

"Why you little – "

"Can you both PLEASE be quiet?" Goku, Gojyo and Sanzo all turned to stare at Hakkai's unusual outburst, even if it wasn't yelled. But Hakkai's quiet speech was far scarier and dangerous than Sanzo's yells of "Shi-ne!" or "Urusei!" So they all scuttled up to the porch, and Hakkai knocked on the door. Almost immediately, the person inside answered the door. But instead of opening the door, an eyehole was opened, and a pair of bloodshot brown eyes could be seen peering down at the foursome.

"And who would you be?" the eyes greeted them harshly, looking up and down at them. Hakkai paused for a bit before answering,

"Um, well, we're travelers heading for the West, and we were wondering whether we could stay here for some food and shelter." Hakkai shot a glare at Gojyo before he could add anything else (such as women or sake). "We will gladly pay whatever the price is as it seems like this is the only inn in this town, or so our escort Rina told us."

'The eyes' scrutinized each one of them, as if searching for something. Even Gojyo and Goku fell silent under the almost tangible gaze of the one who would decide their fate – namely, whether they are 'accepted' or not. Finally, the voice belonging to the eyes spoke.

"Get lost, and don't bother coming back. The next town's only 400 miles away – I'm sure you can handle it." Stunned into silence (or even more silence – for a split second, you couldn't hear the foursome's brains think), the group was caught off-guard until Goku was about to open his protesting mouth (who was promptly restrained by Hakkai).

"Why not? I assure you that whatever the price is, we can afford it, and more if you wish."

"Yea! We'll even throw in a free monkey who'll gladly be your slave! Or monkey!"

"OI! Gojyo! I'm -"

"As if I'd let four weird-looking men come into _this_ place! So go away!" With that, the eyehole snapped shut. Before Goku could begin his incessant whine about his hunger again, Sanzo decided to take matters in his own hands.

-BANG!-

Shooting once towards the already-setting sun, he decided the innkeeper should learn the hard way. Cocking it again, he growled,

"_No-one_ says no to me. And if you don't haul your butt over right now and let us in, I might just…slip-up and shoot something _unintentionally_." Goku yelped at the dark aura pouring out of Sanzo's body, although Gojyo smirked and decided to chip in.

"Yea! Nobody refuses the ultimate, all-powerful _Sanzo-sama_!" He was hoping that it would work as stating Sanzo's status out to the usually slow commoners would send them in a complete flurry and wave of desperate apologies and utmost respect, leading to the best accommodation they couldn't have received if they didn't know. However, Sanzo took his comment as an insult towards him, and was about to fire when the eyehole opened once more.

"How old?"

Blinking in confusion, 4 pairs of eyes turned to meet one.

"Excuse me?" Hakkai ventured, voicing the group's thoughts. The eyes rolled upwards in frustration before the voice repeated,

"How old are you guys?" It spoke slowly, as if they were stupid. This brought back the twitch Sanzo had at full force, but Hakkai answered before Sanzo's temper got the best of him.

"Well, I'm 22, Gojyo here is 22, Sanzo is 23 and Goku is…uh…18, although he's actually over 500 years old – but I'd rather not go into details. Why do you ask?" The voice 'humphed' and replied,

"Sorry. You guys are too old to stay. Now leave like I said before we had to have this stupid conversation!"

Sanzo had had enough. Pointing his gun straight between the chocolate eyes, he glowered, and hissed between his teeth,

"_Die_."

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Kari: I don't believe it. Another over-a-year break. This might get confusing people – my writing style has probably changed a LOT. Gaahh!

Sanzo: Maybe I can help you motivate yourself….-aims gun at Kari-

Goku: NOOOOOoooooo Sanzo! If you kill her now, we'll definitely be stuck here forever in this story! And I STILL haven't eaten! –wails loudly-

Kari: -snickering- Thanks Goku, even I was scared for a moment. But anyway. Sorry people, I decided to be mean and leave the revelations later on. HA! But more importantly, will Sanzo finally break and kill the innkeeper? Will Goku ever get to eat? Am I going to shut up with the rhetorical questions?

Gojyo: Even more importantly, will I even get to see any women?!?

Sanzo: -whacks Gojyo and Goku with his fan- URUSEI!

Hakkai: Yare yare desune…


End file.
